The past several years felt like a waste and I didn’t want to lose any more — no more loss of people I love and no more lost time. I had to keep my foot on the gas 24/7. I didn’t realize it until later, but I was running away from loss. My therapist brought it up. My dad called it out. My mentor reminded me. I was so afraid of facing loss again that I packed my days in an effort to avoid it. When I found myself staring at it again, I hit a wall so hard that placed me in quicksand. The words escaped my lips yet again, “I don’t want to be here anymore.” It felt like I was drowning and I had no idea what to do next.