It’s too much.

I was on fire all of the time. It did not matter what the situation was. Whether I was sitting on the couch, working out or attempting to sleep, my body felt like an inferno. My legs would shake uncontrollably as if I was experiencing spasms. I didn’t feel like myself anymore. I wasn’t supposed to be here. I told myself that for a long time. I used to have nightmares of an untimely passing. Growing up in the environment I did made it feel likely. After feeling my whole life that I wouldn’t be here too long, I became overwhelmed with that feeling over the last two years.